Signature Dish of Alan Zelt

Lutefisk Preparation

1 Lutefisk
5 sticks firewood
1 quart gasoline
1 750ml Finlandia, poured over ice

Pour a glass of Finlandia (ice or not is optional). Take a healthy drink, because this preparation is man's work.

Dig a hole in your backyard. About 3ft deep should be sufficient.

To this hole, add the Lutefisk and then the five fireplace logs.

Douse wood with the gasoline. Step back, and ignite the wood. Ensure that the fire is on high.

Sit back, away from the fire, on a comfortable chair. Take another drink.

In about 15 minutes, the fire should have died down. Stir the embers, until there is a consistency throughout of fine soot.

So that you remember this happy occasion, pour a shot of vodka into the embers, uttter "thank God," and go inside and have a great dinner. Merry Christmas.

Suggested Wine: Finlandia
Serving Ideas: Before eating a good meal.

Notes: After you have bought a lutefisk, you will need a good method of preparation. While this preparation method is a bit unconventional, it will satisfy all unnatural cravings for lutefisk.

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